Hell Fears None, Except A Hawkeye And Her Gun
by RedneckOtaku
Summary: Lieutenant Hawkeye. Need I say more? R&R Oneshot


Disclaimer: I do not own FMA

Hell Fears None, Except A Hawkeye And Her Gun

BANG!  
BANG!  
BANG!  
BANG!

Gunshots rang through out the Military Operations Building. Everyone under Colonel Roy Mustang knew exactly what was going on. He some how managed to piss off his First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye. People not under Mustang, soon knew what was going on when they heard this.

"Colonel! You are a bastard! Now get the paperwork done!" Hawkeye yelled from the closed office of Mustang and Hawkeye. Followed by "Sir."

Mustang's subordinates went on with their work like it wasn't a big deal. They were even able to ignore the occasional puff of smoke that would crawl out from under the door. This was a typical everyday occurrence. Even the occasional visitors, such as Edward and Alphonse Elric and their close friend Winry Rockbell, would just ignore the shouting, gunshots and smoke. Everyone was used to it. That is, they were used to Riza Hawkeye's sudden outbursts at her commanding officer.

"Hold that thought sir." Hawkeye said calmly and walked over to the door and opened it. Smoke along with Hawkeye's pet dog Black Hayate, emerged from the opened door. People peered into the room and as the smoke began to clear, they saw bullet holes and scorch marks all over the office. Hawkeye again closed the door and the shouting began once again.

"Don't be so stingy. I just don't see what the problem is of making the female officers where miniskirts!" The voice of Roy was heard, followed by a few more gunshots. "Shutting up!" Roy said as a large explosion was heard, symbolizing he just attempted to fight back.

One more shot was heard then the door opened and Hawkeye walked out. She was carrying her black pistol in her hand and moved over to the supply closet to stock up on ammunition. People crowded around the doorway of the small office and saw Roy sitting behind his desk, quickly filling out paperwork. Hawkeye reloaded her gun, grabbed some extra ammunition then headed back to the office.

Bang!

The people crowded around the door all scrambled and went back to work allowing Hawkeye to enter the office. About an hour or so passed and Hawkeye left to go grab lunch. While she was gone, Roy took this opportunity to give his hand a brake. He dropped the pen and leaned back, massaging his hand.

"Damn that woman is good." He commented with a smile just as he heard heeled foot steps enter his office. He gulped and looked across the room to where he thought he saw Hawkeye standing. Only, their was something different. Her hair was down, allowing golden waves to flow along her back as she walked into the office. Also, she was wearing the military blue uniform, only with a mini skirt. She even had the hat on, which was pulled over her eyes, which was strange for the military. She was identical to Hawkeye and Roy couldn't get his eyes off her.

"Colonel Roy Mustang, sir?" The girl stepped into the office and saluted the colonel. Roy stood up and saluted back, then both dropped their hands.

"Sorry for the interruption Colonel, but I'm looking for Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye." The lady stood firmly in front of his desk.

"She just stepped out for a moment to grab lunch. Is their anything I can help you with?" Roy asked, trying to keep his eyes on her face and not her legs. Lucky for him, she didn't notice.

"No sir, I need to speak with Lt. Hawkeye." She looked over to the corner where Hawkeye's desk was located.

"I'm Lt. Hawkeye. May I help you Ma'am." Hawkeye returned holding both her's and Roy's lunch. She entered the office and walked towards Roy. She put the lunches down and turned to face the lady. They saluted each other then as the other lady smiled, Hawkeye gasped.

"Teres? Is that really you?" Hawkeye smiled as the lady took off her hat and held it under her arm.

"It's been a long time Riza." Teres smiled as the two girls did a little 'best-girl-friends-jump-hug-and-giggle-thing'. Roy watched in confusement. The girls separated and stood apart, trying to act more military style, brushing off thier jackets.

"Girl it's been ages." Riza looked Teres over, up and down. "Where have you been?"

"Here and there." Teres replied. "I've just recently got reassigned to a new post. I'm surprised you didn't receive the paperwork." Riza arched an eyebrow then turned to face Roy.

"This my dear Teres is my commanding officer, Co. Roy Mustang. And that," Hawkeye pointed to Roy, then to the stack of paperwork on his desk. "Is probably where we will find your file and reassignment paperwork." Riza turned back to Teres.

"So where are you stationed? What post?" Hawkeye questioned her companion.

"Well my dear, I've been assigned to work next to you." Teres smiled, Roy gulped and Riza glowed with happiness. They hugged once more before Roy cleared his throat, getting both of their attentions. The girls parted and looked at him.

"Lovely to have little conversations here, but who are you?" Roy said looking at the lady next to Hawkeye with an arch eyebrow. Just then Black Hayate walked in.

"Black Hayate I pressume?" Teres aked.

"Yes." Riza replied and smiled.

"Hello." Roy called out sarcasticly.

"This is..." Riza began but Teres stopped her and took over the introductions.

"My name is first Lieutenant Teres Hawkeye, sir" The lady smiled and saluted Roy who could only stare dumbfoundly at the two girls.

"Si...sis...sisters?" Roy stuttered as Teres put her hand down.

"Not just sisters Colonel," Riza started.

"Twins!" Both girls exclaimed together a bit to excited for Roy, who fell backwards into his chair.

"Great, two Hawkeyes. You really do hate me don't you?" Roy said looking and pointing up at the ceiling. "Your laughing at me, aren't you Maes. I just know you are. And your teasing me. Well move over, I'll be joining you soon." Roy continued to look up at the ceiling.

"Colonel?" Teres looked over at her new commanding officer with confusement.

"I'll fill you in later." Riza replied as she rolled her eyes. She lead her sister over to her desk and allowed Teres to sit. While sitting her jacket moved to the side and Roy noticed a black pistol in it's holster. He gulped.

"Something wrong Sir?" Riza turned from her sister and over to Roy who was looking pale. Roy smiled to himself then turned to face the girls. Time to be Roy Mustang.

"Now see Hawkeye...I mean Lieutenant Riza, miniskirts aren't that bad. I mean if your lovely sister wears them..." He smiled playfully. Both Hawkeyes stood up and pulled out their pistols. Roy gulped

BANG! BANG!  
BANG! BANG!  
BANG! BANG!

Both girls fired at Roy as he ducked and dodged the double flying bullets. People yet again crowed around the doorway to look in on the action.

"They are both excellent marksmen." Major Alex Armstrong started as bullets flew everywhere, girls standing next to each other. Mirror images of each other. Roy attempted alchemy, but before he could snap his fingers, a bullet wizzed by his head. Then followed by another.

"He doesn't stand a chance." Lieutenant Jean Fuery mentioned as Roy continued to dodge bullets and attempt to attack back.

"Hell fears none..." Roy yelled out as he jumped behind his desk. "Except two Hawkeyes and their guns."

A/N- Whether Riza really has a sister is beyond me. But wouldn't Roy shit if she did. Please R&R. Constructive criticism accepted. No flames (That's Roy's job)

Please look in my profile oo0AnimeChild0oo for all my other stories. I have finished stories, in progress stories and some stories that are forever on going with no end. I also often make request in my profile for help finding information. So please, check out my profile. And again, thanks for reading. 


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